Italy is Hard
A sentiment I have heard repeatedly during the four months we have been here is how hard living in
Huh?
I get the feeling I am missing something. And, since I don’t like to be in the dark and, more accurately, because I am nosey, I decided to do a little informal research.
From swimming lessons to Girl Scouts and ballet to play group, I listened and took mental notes when my fellow spouses began to talk about how hard, stressful, maddening, etc. living in Italy is. Even my doctor commented about how surprisingly low my normally astronomically high blood pressure was at my last appointment because “living in
Here are some of the reasons
“There is no base housing.”
True, in the conventional sense of housing within the confines of the gated base area, there is no base housing. But, the base does have homes they have leased from area landlords (GRHP) in addition to the homes they have built in the local communities to house personnel (BTL).
“There were people ahead of us on the housing list, so we had to find a house on the economy.”
And, this is different from every other base how?
Now, I am not without sympathy on this one. I know the language barrier must make this more difficult than in the states, but most of Italians who have rental homes here do speak at least some English since the majority of their renters are American.
“Everything is at a much slower pace.”
Yes. Savor it. We Americans seem to always be rushing around, cramming our schedules to over-flowing. Their slower pace of life almost forces us to slow down and actually enjoy some peace and quiet.
“No one speaks English.”
That’s because it is
“I don’t speak any Italian so it is nearly impossible to even go out to dinner or fill my gas tank.”
They sell these handy little things called English-Italian dictionaries at the BX. Many restaurants’ menus are in Italian and English. Again, if you put forth a little effort, you will find many Italians know at least a few words of English and will make every attempt to help to you if you first show them the respect of trying to speak their language.
“They drive like maniacs.”
I completely agree with this. Italians are some of the most laid back people until they get behind the wheel of a car. They are always in a hurry on the road. Just pretend you are in a big city with impatient drivers (
“Everything is closed in the middle of the day.”
It’s called riposo. The Italians place a high value on family. They shut down their businesses to have a family meal and rest. It’s not that difficult to adjust your schedule accordingly. Besides, the BX, commissary, Four Seasons and Shoppette are open if you simply must shop.
“There is no such thing as a quick dinner in the restaurants and no fast food.”
Isn’t it nice? Once you are seated that table is yours for as long as you want. No server hovering over you, rushing you in order to turn the table over to another party. I can’t imagine actually craving fast food while living in
“All of my neighbors are Italian and never speak to me.”
Do you speak to them? A warm smile and a “ciao” or “salve” may be all that is needed to break the ice. Most of my neighbors are older and according to my landlord of a more reserved generation. But, I make a point to speak to them when I see them. My breaking the ice has resulted in some animated conversations peppered with broken English, my butchering their beautiful language, frantic flipping through the dictionary and lots of hand gestures.
“There is nothing to do.”
We are still talking about
“Everything is so old.”
It’s called history. Perhaps you studied it in school…
And, the reasons just keep piling on and in my opinion getting weaker and weaker.
So, basically my research has revealed that
OH! I could not agree more with you!! Thank you for writing this!! I hear the exact same things every day--just substitute the word "Japan" for "Italy". (Well the same complaints minus the complaint about no base housing, since there is base housing here--though there is also a waiting list.) I live "on the economy" and I LOVE it.
It's about attitude, and a sense of adventure. I always wonder why someone chose (yes, it was a choice!) to become a military spouse if they wanted to stay in the US--and to be honest, I wish the ones who hate foreign countries would STAY in the US!
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You need to change that last line to "STAY on the U.S. Mainland." It's the same here in Hawaii. Some people are just whiny and will never be happy anywhere other than the block where they grew up. Even then, they will complain about it.
Perhaps the Marine Corps will send us on a hardship tour to Italy..... A girl can dream, right?
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My apologies, Barb. You're exactly right...I should have said the US MAINLAND.
I'm still astonished at how many spouses here never leave the base. I met one the other day who has been here two years, and said, when I suggested lunch in town, that she doesn't eat raw fish, and "that's all the Japanese eat." Umm...that's sort of like the Japanese woman who was surprised to discover that American's DON'T all have hamburgers three meals a day, seven days a week!
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That is so pathetic!
I don't know where you are in Japan, but we spent three years in Iwakuni. It's a tiny little base, it was only 6 miles around the entire base. At one Town Hall meeting a bunch of wives were complaining because the base didn't have a Discovery Zone. Idiots.
Those were probably the same people who were afraid to go to the little fruit stand just outside the front gate because the whole Yen/Doller conversion confused them. At the time the rate was $1=100 Yen.
Idiots.
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It really is pathetic. I have a blast here! I'm in Sasebo, which is TEEENY. I can walk completely around the entire base in about ten minutes. We're so small that we have actual Travel & Tours trips to shop at the Iwakuni base...seriously! Once a month, we have a bus to the "big commissary"! Too funny.
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I remember those kind of comments when we lived in Germany. And you know, I would have loved to have went back to Germany for a third time. Or Italy or anywhere else outside of the U.S. Mainland. Hawaii would have been good.
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I really must come visit you so I have something to complain about whilst taking a nap on your couch, belly full of pasta and bags full of pottery.
The people who don't "get it" are the same people who will complain if they arrived too late at McDonald's to get an Egg McCrappin before 11:00.
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Please tell these foolish people to go back to the States so people, like me, who would LOVE to get an assignment to Italy can take their place.
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Amen, sister! We were in Italy for a year, on the economy, in a neighborhood where no English was spoken, and we loved it! I still miss my terrace; the view was amazing. Our landlord spoke no English, but that didn't stop him from bringing us fresh produce, showing off the baby bunnies, or fixing anything the day it broke. We miss Italy, and we can't wait to go back for vacation someday. Going to Italy without all my worldly goods and cats sounds pretty close to Heaven. Oh, yeah, and the mere name McDonalds nauseates me now!
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Hey! Good post! I've added my two cents via my own post (just in case the trackback doesn't work).
Oh, and glad Mr. liked the pumpkin. I got the design, hubby carved it. One of the better ones imo.
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It is a shame that so many spend so much of their time complaining about their situation. I lived on the economy MY ENTIRE TWO YEARS I was stationed at Rhein Main AFB in Frankfurt WGermany.
My first apartment was with 3 other guys from a sister-shop (I was in INS/Doppler Nav and they were in the Radar Shop). All 3 of us were game - we even bought CARS so we could get around. Later, I moved into my own apartment in Heusenstamm (near Offenbach). Christmas Eve, at Midnight, the Church bells ringing, it's snowing, and I opened my sliding skylights to let the snow and the sound drift in ... what a memory ...
Yep, you get out there and take ITALY BY STORM!!!
Great blog, I'm comin' back often!!!
(as an aside, both my daughters are taking Italian in school because they are in a Catholic School. can't wait to take them on a trip - they can do ALL THE TALKING [not like they don't now])
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Not a military spouse and only visited Italy for a few days once, but one of the things I adored about it was the slower pace.
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That's where the phrase 'ugly Americans' came from. I spent 10 days in Italy this year. The only thing missing was my husband
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I am also not affliated with the military in any way but I have traveled to Italy and absolutly loved it there. (I did study the language and from my aproximations in addition to driving quickly, Italians speak really quickly. I could barely follow what anyone said despite three semesters of italian lessons. Oh well. They mostly all undestood me)
I'm rather appalled that people can't appreciate what a lovely and fascinating country Italy can be. Talk about a wasted oppertunity.
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Thanks for the education! I hope you get the chance to lovingly pass along your sage advice to some of the McDonald's-lovers and make a difference. In the meantime, thanks for being a good representative there. Enjoy your adventure!
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